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Even Organic Food is Full of Chemicals

A common buzzword among the hippie elite is chemicals. Did you know that you have chemicals in your food? Did you know that chemicals can kill you? Chemicals are bad! They cause cancer, heart disease, and mental deficiency. For the last part, you need only look at organic food munching, local food purchasing hippies to see that even “healthy” food is full of chemicals.

But no Derek, that can’t be true? It is, and I’ll illustrate a number of chemicals below that make up the food you eat, and explain why this line of thinking is utterly worthless. It is time for a chemistry lesson.

C5H5N5O – 2-aminohypoxanthine – Also known as Guanine. Guanine is a derivative of purine. Both of those words sound pretty bad after all purine is just ‘p’ with ‘urine’ after it. The fact is though, it is in every food you eat and you yourself are riddled with this nefariously-named chemical. It is one of the four nucleobases that make up your DNA. Everything from plants to fungi to animals have DNA, itself a rather complex molecule made up of Guanine and it’s sisters, Adenine, Cytosine, and Thymine.
C12H22O11 – fructofuranosyl-(2→1)-α-D-glucopyranoside – Also known as Sucrose. Do you enjoy sugar? You should, it makes your body work. Without it, you simply would not be able to function. And this glucopyranoside is your main source. Along with lactose, fructose, and a myriad other -oses, they enable you to function.
HO2CCH(NH2)(CH2)4NH2 – 2,6-diaminohexanoic acid – Also known as Lysine. This little bugger might worry you. Not only does it have a name reminiscent of Lysol, a cleaner you should never drink, it’s full scientific name contains the word ‘acid’. What you might not realize, is that you need a number of acids in your diet to survive. Particular those like lysine, an essential amino acid used by your body to build protein. Do you want to get ripped? Then don’t poo-poo protein.
H2O – Dihydrogen Oxide – Also known as Water. Yep, seriously, water is a chemical. Like everything it’s a molecule. It is also necessary to life as we know it and a common component of probably just about everything you have ever and will ever eat.
The point of this exercise is to point out the absurdity of thinking that something is bad just because other things that sound like it might actually be bad. When you hear about new chemicals, thinking Ammonium Hydroxide, maybe its best to be a little curious about what they actually do before you set out to remove them from your food.

While it may not seem like it, since we don’t directly observe items on the molecular scale on a day to day basis, everything from your table to the computer you are using right now is made up of chemicals, or complex molecules honed to provide you with the services and lifestyle you enjoy. You can’t escape it. That tree out your window – Chemicals. Your favorite dog Skip – Chemicals. Your significant other – Chock full of chemicals.

All of the chemicals in the list above sound terrible if you don’t know what they are and unless you’re some sort of chemistry fetishist, you probably did not. But, if you tried to remove those from your diet or life, you would die. No if, ands, or buts about it. Just eternal sleep. Thank goodness for chemicals.

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